I despise people who had no empathy.

I bend over backwards all the time to be helpful but all I get is a hill of beans.

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Rant

I hear the weight in my own words. It sounds like I'm carrying a heavy burden, one I initially embraced but that has now left me feeling exhausted and isolated. It's that deep weariness that makes me long to escape, to just be still and quiet, free from the constant demands of life. I'm grieving for a younger self I wish I could have guided differently—to slow down, to breathe, and to not feel the immense pressure to accomplish everything at once. It feels like my life started too early, and now I'm caught in a current that's moving too fast. The hardest part seems to be the quietness of my struggle. I feel like I'm crying out for help, but the sound is so soft that no one can hear it, and even when they do, the relief is only temporary.
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"I once heard someone say, “Do not speak to those who do not listen,” and it stayed with me. I stopped talking to anyone who made me feel like my words did not matter as much as my excitement to share them. It was one of the best things I did for my peace of mind. It taught me self-respect, saved my energy, and helped me see who truly cared and who only pretended to" One of the toughest parts of getting older is discovering that many friendships that lasted years were fundamentally  situational , rooted in fleeting shared moments instead of profound connection.  Believe it or not, friendships are usually for a  season , not a lifetime.  Though it hurts to see them go, this loss is a clear sign that you're evolving. Just make peace with the fact that  some people are simply  a chapter  in your story, and that conclusion is exactly as it should be.
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Its my day 1 of social media detox. I love that my mind is not occupied with trivial issues going on, although I'm certain that I'm missing on noteworthy affairs as well. But I've been longing for those social media-free days. At least those days where we can rant without being denounced by strangers. People are sick and mean, saying things to get someone's approval and agreement. To each his own they say, but the argument will never end unless its in their favor.  Whatever. Also I have to be completely honest, as much as I love seeing my (successful and rich) friends enjoying their crazy rich asian lifestyles, spending most of their time with their kids doing tonnes of things I wish I am doing with mine, I am envious. Needless to say, I believe in each of our own sustenance and blessings. I am just at this phase where I feel pressured, wondering if I am doing good enough to provide for my kids especially. And it gets worse sitting here scrolling through their updates. ...
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